Shorts
by 5kinny.Jeans
Summary: Blah, a bit like the 100themes challenge, except not. Make a request, submit OCs, sorry If I don't complete it. It's just a muse builder for me dudes
1. Streetlight Kisses

"Ohhh fuck, me", I groaned in Craig's ear.

"I will oblige my dearest", he purred back. I turned my head to the side, clumsily placing a kiss on his cheek. No, get your mind out of the gutter Frankie, just because that's where your butt is currently at. Craig put his hands under my armpits and lifted me easily to my feet, I groaned and leant forward into his chest, I was possibly the worst drunk ever. Craig held me steady and looked down at me, silent laughter glinting in his eyes, in my state I huffed and crossed my arms with my chin still resting below his collar bone.

"Don't laugh at me", I moaned, elongating the 'e' at the end so I sounded about 8.

"You're hilarious when you're pissed", he smiled down at me then turned around glanced over his shoulder then grinned. "Your carriage awaits Miss Johnson", I fucking loved that smile, it was my smile.

"Nawhhhh", I flopped my hand "I don't need you to do that, I'm fine", I walked forward and tripped once again on the curb. "Whoopsie!" I giggled but regained my footing. Craig shook his head a smile still on his face as he curled an arm around my waist. I threw my arm over his broad shoulders, idly playing with the dark hair at the nape of his neck before it met his hat.

"You're a lovely mess you know?" Craig smiled adoringly down at me, kissing my damp forehead through my unruly fringe and I smiled back. Happy, happy, fuckety happy.

"I'm your mess" and we wobbled off down the street together, our shadows melting together in the pooling lamp light.

**-**

**Some lovely gooey Crankie for you (That is some epic shit right there Craig+Frankie=Crankie)  
**


	2. Fucking Bliss

The music exploded from over thousand dollar speakers, the bassline thumping in my bones as I sat on the window seat with Jude, our beer bottles swung in our hands our joints balanced in our spare fingers. I was aware of my fringe sticking to my forehead in the heat, the smoke and alcohol hot and strong on my teeth, a couple made out on a random dining hall chair near us and a huge curtain was on the floor at our feet, which were bare now you mention it. I didn't remember losing my shoes. Jude was minus the bandana she'd worn tonight instead of her usual tuque, she grinned lazily and we sat in companiable silence. Token had Wendy and Bebe hanging off of each of his arms as I surveyed the tightly packed room, if I was him I'd lord it up while I could he'd have hell to pay in the morning, even though he has his parents on a tight leash this was the best party he'd had in a long time.

I brought out the packet of white powder, swiping my furry feeling tongue over my index and middle fingers before dipping it into the clear re-sealable bag then wiping said powder onto my gums, the taste was overridden as I noticed an abandoned vodka bottle on the floor. I raised it grinning like a mentalist at Jude and downed a bit before nursing my fast burning joint, handing her the MD and what was left of the vodka, I blew a smoke ring feeling the crazy happy feeling like, forcing its way up from my stomach making me feel like I wanted to burst. Everything was happening out of time and the happy feeling seized me, Jude soon after our grins splitting our faces practically in half as we finished our smokes and we must've dropped them at some point because I didn't have mine In my hands when we kissed, I swear to god I didn't.

Y'see me and Jude don't hesitate.

"I KISSED A GIRL AND I LIKED IT, THE TASTE OF HER CHERRY CHAPSTICK" in slurred voices our grins returning, everything was pumping Technicolor as we threw our arms round each other's shoulders before breaking off to our respective McCormick brothers, Jude winked at me as she leant heavily against Kevin. Kenny immediately grinded against me, we were all fucked out of our minds.

"Good time princess?" he purred in my ear and I smiled up at him, pressing my lips to his ear.

"If you stick your goddamn tongue in my mouth like you're supposed to, you'll find out what a fucking good time I've been having" he was going to have to do with leftovers, Jude still had my only bag.

Me and Jude. Jude and me. Two dark haired teens hanging back and watching us with our imperfect perfections. Fucking bliss.

**-**

**Nothing special, pretty retarded too many commas and shit. I find it too easy to write Jude.**

**Much love to Hollywood Grimm and her amazing character Jude Monroe, that idea of yours stuck in my head and it was too good a opportunity because I couldn't figure out where they were gonna stub out their joints XD**

**It occurred to me how much they have in common; note the last couple of lines.**


	3. Safer To Hate Her

"Oh god, here she comes!" Gwen Simmons hissed to the rest of the girls as I approached, I tried to look nonchalant but just ended up making myself look smaller, I sloped up to the group as a few of them giggled loudly before being shushed by the others. Then there was the silence, everyone was looking at me as I peered out from under my thick fringe obviously with large teary baby eyes, Gwen smiled one of her fakest smiles and I knew I was done for.

"Oh _hi_ Emilie", the way she said it made the knots in my stomach start to writhe like live snakes I forced a shaky smile. This obviously made the other girls suppress from bursting into hysterics, I had braces and was the first and only so far to receive them. I pulled my lips back over my teeth tightly; Gwen glanced from left to right at her two henchbitches. I had no idea what to do.

"Ems, could you quickly do something for us?" Gwen said in a pally way and linked arms with me suddenly. I felt like I had a cobra looped through my arm not a girl, she bent her head near mine after I gave a tiny nervous nod. "Well y'know that girl, the disgusting one?" I winced Greta Bruce wasn't exactly the most beautiful or friendly girl and her personal hygiene was known all over the school. Greta's long thick and wavy black hair was always streaked with grease and specks of dandruff; she was tall and almost equally matched by her width and worst of all she stank of pickled onions and sweat. Poor girl…

"Yeah?" I questioned in my answer, I would do anything for it to mean I wasn't permanently outside of everything.

"Well…"

--

I sat in A&E a few hours later, blood matted in my dark honey blonde fringe a huge shiner stretched from my brow to below my cheek bone my lip was split and I appeared to have broken several ribs. I watched as paramedics wheeled in one of them table things it's occupant, a kid who was quite a lot older than me, I recognised him because he died all the time. The paramedics were shouting loudly as they screeched off round a corner. Hell's Pass was really a _crap _hospital. My mom grasped my shoulder tightly and I could feel her concerned gaze bore into the side of my head, I felt like a zombie, I wanted to go to sleep… scratch that. I wanted to find a nice rock, squeeze myself underneath it curl up and die. I hadn't said anything at all to my Mom since around 7 o'clock that morning.

We'd been waiting for 4 or 5 hours by the time I was called in, stitches were needed for the cut on my forehead even though it was already scabbed over I got these painful ass bandages around my middle for my cracked ribs. My Mom tried to talk to me for a bit in the car on the way home, but I didn't speak. I brushed my teeth, pulled off my shoes and fell straight to sleep. The next day my Mom turned off my alarm but I woke up anyway, I dragged myself out of bed glancing in the mirror I confirmed my suspicions I looked like hell. The purple of my black eye contrasted with the dew-on-grass of my iris. Every time I breathed in my ribcage felt like it was trying to claw its way right out of me and the stitches stretched along my brow whenever I moved my face.

I packed, got dressed into some Hollister and Abercrombie shit because that's what Gwen's lot wore and headed out. My Mom was asleep on the sofa downstairs; I didn't care to wake her. I deliberately avoided the bus stop and took my walking route to school, giving me time to compose myself or whatever; I made it to the gate before I felt like puking. Kids brushed past me on either side, not noticing me whatsoever just another little fish in the sea of wannabes, I felt smaller than I ever had right then. I saw from the corner of my eye a Canadian kid from my year watching me for a minute before I braced myself and walked into school. Homeroom was my own personal nightmare.

Gwen and everyone ignored me completely, boys wondered at my wounds and asked me how I got them, I stammered and tried to stall until they all went back to their seats. I sat down, resting my forehead against my desk and wishing I could just disappear, we had a sub homeroom teacher that day and she chose very wisely not to bother me. I really wanted to cry, and it sounds so over used but I had that numb out of body feeling so I couldn't. I really fucking couldn't.

--

"Hey! Broflovski!"

"Hey! Griffiths!" he drawls back unenthusiastically, not even bothering to turn around or stop. I catch up with him, my fading black skinny jeans mirror his apart from his have a few more rips in them; I have on his old zip up top that's still huge on me. I hope he won't notice or just ignore it. He's grown that's for sure, still he's like the smallest guy I know but I'm still smaller. I'm his midget. Probably the only reason he hangs out with me, to make himself look taller. Nah I'm kidding, me and Ike just kinda happened and well are still happening as far as I know. Its one of those things I never question. He helped me when Cody died, he helped me cope. We stuck, the world didn't of course it changed and shit, but around us, Ike and me just kicked back and let it happen y'know?

All I know is that Ike is the coolest guy I know. Wow, I just realised how fucking much I want to kiss him.

**-**

**OMG another update so soon!?**

**Well I've been working on this for a couple of days already for a friend of mine and I love writing Emilie. Idk how she got battered I was told to be creative and I couldn't be bothered, I've been listening to all my old Bowling For Soup songs that last part was written to I'll Melt With You. **

**I like skategoth Ike okay?**


	4. Trucker Babes

I sat on the floor my back to the pick up truck and Kate situated to my left, I sighed playing absentmindedly with my tongue stud. Kate clinked her nails against her bottle of whatever it was, I don't think we checked. It was around 9am by my estimate, neither of us had watches and our cells were just flat out of battery, Kenny McCormick was asleep in the front seat of said pick up truck his heavy breathing and a couple of snores let us know he was still alive after copious amounts of alcohol and whatever the fuck else we had last night. My tongue felt furry and I blinked heavily adjusting to the weak trickle of sunlight that was rebounding off the snow, boy my ass was numb as I sat there.

"Well, fuck", I drawled my bottle hitting the compacted snow with a sharp noise that reverberated around my head several agonising times, my eyes were squeezed tightly shut until it stopped I let out a weird sound that seemed like a 'mleh' but kinda not and Kate just laughed at me weakly. I took a swig of the bottle quickly, instantly wishing I hadn't I winced and Kate just shook her head at me and poured some of her crap onto the floor. I tried to get up but my legs said no.

"That was fun", Kate mumbled somewhere to my side, a nice, wide and content smile stretching across her face. I nodded painfully, trying to push back my fringe but getting my fingers tangled in the mess that was my hair I gave up and slumped my hand to the side, tipping my head back against the chipped burnt orange paint of the truck. I stared up at the overcast swirl of sky, darker grey in some places, almost white in others.

"Ugh, Becky's visiting", I thought, my face creasing in distaste at my sister's name, Kate let out a 'pshhh' blow of air.

"Unlucky"

"Tell me about it", I groaned, I was not going home any time soon. We'd lost Jude around 4-5am after we got kicked from Token's but I was pretty sure she was alright, Jude could hold her own. I was unsure as to just how many kids were sprawled in the back under the tarp, I was pretty sure Craig was in there and Rhiannon with 'Stophe who uncharacteristically got drunk and was less stuck up his own ass than usual, don't get me wrong I like the French guy but he's always so uptight. He needs to cut loose sometimes. Rhi always looked fucking fandabbidosy for parties, then so did everyone, the space under my eyes hurt a lot.

I attempted to throw my arm around Kate, I blanched as my back cracked painfully before resting it over her shoulders slowly, matching her smile.

"We wouldn't want it any other way would we Katie-kins?"

"Nah, wouldn't be half as fun", she grinned.

**-**

**Excuse the crapness, I wrote this in the last half an hour without checking. **

**I needed to write something with Katie in it for some reason. Much love to Beyond Birthday, Tight Hold on Death, Hollywood Grimm, Matt Stone and Trey Parker for the characters. For those who follow my other fics, the reason I'm dead for everything else is that I got hit by a car a couple of weeks ago, I'm good though. Broken leg near my hip and a load of broken ribs but I'm good (:**

**-Skinnys**


	5. You Could Be Happy

"Urngh", Kenny's face appeared above me, his face spread into his massive grin.

"Trust you", he said shaking his head at me. Where was I anyway? I tried to move, sat up and hit my head on the wood above me. What the fuck?

"Why am I under your dining room table Kenny?"

"Uh. Shouldn't I be asking you that? How the fuck would I know?"

"Right.", I began to wiggle my way out between the mismatching lawn chairs, before Kenny hauled me up by my hand, I dusted myself off flicking my fringe out of my eyes. "No worse for wear" I breathed, blinking slowly with goopy feeling eyelids. I must've looked a state. I didn't even know what I was wearing, so I looked down. Oh, my dropdead sweatshirt, a pair of tiny black shorts, fishnets and one black patent Mary Jane. Ew, dried puke on my sleeve.

Various people I recognised were strewn about the living and dining room, I hadn't realised but Tweek had passed out on _top_ of the table I laughed at the lipstick smears on his face. Kevin and Jude were asleep practically on each others faces, Rhiannon was curled up like a cat in Christophe's lap, Kate and Hedgehog were lying top and tail on one sofa, Kate's nose squashed against the underside of Hedge's foot totally asleep. Kenny tilted my chin up for a kiss, Karen stumbled into the room tittering, one of her pink stilettos' heel was broken and she had an empty cheap champagne bottle dangling from her right hand. I pulled back smirking at her as she leant against the doorframe, staring at us.

I wanted to sleep. So I lead Kenny to the stained, but comfortable looking rug in the front room amongst the piles of sleeping teenagers and lay down, I stretched out feeling Ken's comfortable warmth at my side as he slung an arm around my waist and buried his face in the hair by my ear. I smiled into the carpet then ran my thumb over the hem of his shirt; he pulled me closer to him. Kenny kissed my forehead as I fell asleep.

-

**Idk myself to be honest.**

**Copyrights to peoples and shit. Uh, submit more OCs please?**

**-5kinnys**


	6. What goes around comes back around

The music thumped from beneath the slates as I sat on the roof of my house, I leant against the chimney and tried to ignore the sound of something breaking and then laughter. My temples pounded, my eyes squeezed shut as I gently thudded my head back against the bricks, I was alone. Since I'd gotten to South Park I'd explored my house top to bottom looking for 'me' places, this was one of the best, just sit on the window sill, open the fire escape window hoist myself out, dangle by my hands then scramble up. I still got bruises and the odd random cut, but it was worth every single one, I pulled my knees up to my chest my arms wrapped around them comfortably and my head sunk forward into them.

My breath escaped from between my knees, pluming up into the freezing night air, I wasn't cold though or if I was I couldn't tell. Kenny had gotten off with this dark haired girl who looked around 10 years old; I was amazed at myself at how annoyed I was. I heard giggling and a low voice, I shrunk into the chimney's side subconsciously, if anyone came out they wouldn't see me. I heard Kenny's voice clearly.

"Come on Cass, up an' Adam", I heard 'Cass' laughing.

"What the fuck Kenny!" It was more of a statement than a question.

"Whaaaaat? No one will be up here", he said a smirk evident in his voice. There was no other way off the roof without jumping and I sure as hell wasn't doing that no matter how much shame it would bring me if I stayed and looked like a perv. I squished myself backwards, and then imagined myself falling with a shudder; I clung to the roof tiles. Kenny was up already pulling a teeny tiny girl up after him, I bit my bottom lip savagely, trying to be invisible as possible.

"Crap! Kenny I'm gonna fall off!" Cass chortled as he sat back and pulled her in-between his legs, kissing her outright as she grabbed his shoulders for support. I closed my eyes, trying to ignore the sounds of smacking lips willing the burning behind my eyes to go away. The worst thing is that try as I might to hate her, I knew that she was actually really nice… And a lot like me. _You don't own him, you don't own him, you don't own him, you don't own him_. I chanted that in my mind, holding my head with both my hands as I let out one tear. One of those moments, so selfish but so common it's unbelievable, I start to blub and I know they're crocodile tears, I think it, I know I shouldn't but I do. Everyone does once in a while, when it's not true, it's just the stuff that seems to matter so much, we're all so vain and self obsessed.

_Right now it sucks to be me._

**-**

**Next one will have more ocs in and will not feature Frankie being a whiny little bitch.**

**Much love to 'DropDeadFatal and her character Cassie.**


	7. Not What It Looks Like 1

Why does he even like _her_? She's a goth, totally unoriginal and completely blanks him. She has bright red dyed hair with black roots, I mean _ew_. She flips everyone off for practically no reason, just stupidly rude. She calls him a conformist, mouths off on everything and takes the piss whenever he opens his mouth. But he's infatuated. So what If she plays the guitar? Come _on_, Teenage Bands are so 90s, they're all shit nowadays. She has goddamn _piercings_ to the extreme, what if he tried to kiss her and her piercing like stabbed him or got caught on his braces? Goddamn Baby Jesus, she's not right, especially not for Ike. And does he listen to me? No. I swear, everyone else's best friends get a say in weather they think someone's right for them.

Fuck, why am I obsessing over this? It's never been so damn _complicated_ before, it was just Ike and Me, Me and Ike and the older kids from time to time, not to mention the Goth kids actually… Well, not _much_ other stuff. But really it was only me and Ike. It just _was_.

And now she was here… And it _wasn't_ anymore.


	8. Not What It Looks Like 2

So… yeah. Emilie's acting weird lately, like a girl for once. It's creeping me out. So what if I like Star Tucker? She's really pretty in her own way and she's just _awesome_, not like any other girl I've known and so interesting. She's a Goth, sure but come on, she doesn't call me a conformist _that _often and I'm sure she isn't as bad as Kinder Goth or anything… Bleh. I still like her, regardless of what Emilie thinks. She's just being stupid and controlling. I wonder if I should be more of a Goth so that Star might hang out with me? Didn't Stan go Goth ages ago and call himself 'Raven'? Well I'm sure I could, I mean, I have black hair like him and everything. Yeah, that's what I'll do a fail safe way to try and get closer to her.

That's me, Ike Broflovski. I have a logical way to plan everything. I wonder why Emilie doesn't see it my way? Stupid girls, thinking about rainbows and unicorns and shit. I can't be bothered with people like that; Star would never be like that. Then again… I was a bit harsh to her on the phone this morning, I wonder if I should apologise? Who am I kidding! She won't care, she's Emilie even if she's acting like a complete girl lately.

She's practically a guy anyway.


	9. All We've Got's This Sunny Afternoon

Me, Christy, Rhiannon, Dylan and Kate sat on the carpet in Rhi's living room, I was currently lying on my back wondering if we were actually going to _do_ anything. Okay, fair enough we were supposed to be waiting for Hedge, Kelly and Siryn but I'm not the greatest for waiting. I blew my red hair out of my eyes, well partially red I've been trying loads of shit with it lately, ginger (well more orangey than red), brown and Hedge helped me use semi-permanent black a month or two ago. The doorbell went and I opened my eyes lazily seeing Rhi spring to her feet to go see who it was.

Thankfully it was all three of them, the sun was starting to set already and it was getting colder by the second as we set off to a few fields around Hedge, Mine and Kenny's neighbourhood. It hadn't really made any sense to meet up at Rhi's considering her house was in a nicer part of town but everyone knew were it was so it was the only real option. And I think Christy and Kelly in particular didn't like the idea of being mugged. So we wandered to meet the guys slowly, shoving each other, talking loudly, dancing stupidly and the usual stuff. I lit a smoke and a few of them wrinkled their noses but I just shrugged and shared it with Hedge for a while, we tramped over the long grass that brushed against our knees, for a moment I wondered what we were walking over and immediately shut up my brain, not a good idea.

We heard them before we saw them, Jude was blasting some amazing music from a pretty awesome looking boombox, Stan was lying down with her on the bonnet and they were using a bong by the looks of things. Craig was sitting on the roof, his legs dangling over the edge, Kyle was telling Kenny off about something or other a few metres away, this girl called Robin was sitting with her back against the wheel of the car talking animatedly with Cassie. Ike was dancing with that girl Emilie and a girl I recognised as Craig's younger sister Starla but Star was more swaying than anything and didn't look too happy. We walked over to them happily and greeted everyone, Kenny wrapped me in a big hug, Kyle gave a small wave, Craig just looked me in the eye for a second, Jude called out to me and Stan gave me a nod.

Oh yeah, you're probably wondering why I said that Jude and Stan were on the _bonnet_. Basically there was this clapped out old VW hippy van that had been abandoned in the 60s but was still not too rusty… Well to look at it was fine; it would never start in a million years. Christophe and Gregory turned up next, Rhi swept Chris away immediately, Clyde, Token, Tweek and Thomas were next and everyone was in a stupidly good mood. Pip and Damien came up a few minutes later and by now there were loads of us. I pulled myself up next to Craig who was still sat by himself, he glanced at me but continued to ignore me steadily. Kevin showed and was making out enthusiastically with Jude, Stan sat cross legged on the grass. Wendy and Bebe had rolled up without me noticing and were sitting cross legged on the floor giggling. By now there were around 30 of us and we were all singing to whatever songs we knew.

We danced stupidly for ages letting stuff mess with our heads, the sun was actually still quite high in the sky I lead a super fast twist medley where everyone fell in a heap. I was squished between Clyde and Kenny, Kate was laughing so hard somewhere to my left I thought she was going to die. We untangled ourselves and all lay down on the ground trying to regain our breath, apart from Ike and Star who had decided not to join in. Spoilsports. I laughed throwing back my head and just enjoying the day and shit. Someone passed around some juice or… something, I wasn't really sure. Then we heard it. A massive clap of thunder.

We all stared around, wondering where the clouds had come from and shrugged, it was common for there to be thunder but nothing after that. We continued chatting as lightening flashed across the sky, one more rumble of thunder and then it happened. The heavens opened and pissed down on us, it was that super heavy rain that was like a bucket of water, everyone screamed and the boys gasped. We all dived for the van, I managed to get into the back which was converted to a mattress I sat with my back against the window as people piled in on top of me, screeching, laughing, shaking and grinning. 29 of us stuffed into a 50s edition of a VW, actually 28, Christophe was standing in the rain, drenched through. The trees bent against the force of the wind and the sleet, even Chris realised what a bad idea it had been and sprinted toward the edge Rhi opened the door for him and motioned for him to jump in. He launched himself in and everyone gasped and laughed as the van swayed dangerously.

That was probably one of the best 3 hours of my life, everyone in that tiny van, we opened the side windows and tried to space ourselves out, in the end I was only lying across Craig and Thomas. We didn't smoke though, on request of those who didn't and preferred not being 'passive' smokers we talked about everything as the rain bounced off the thin tin roof. We had managed to rescue the boom box before it was too late and it rested on the dashboard, I'd thought as we piled in that it would surely be smashed to pieces. As most people know, teenager stampede's are not something you want to get caught up in, weather you're a person or an inanimate object.

I smiled and laid back in Thomas's lap much to his discomfort I put my arms behind my head, it was boiling in there but it was just… I don't know. Safe. And stuff. I looked up lazily into the faces of a few people around me. South Park was definitely the best thing that ever happened to me.

**Hngjidsokp Not checked, I'm tired. But yeah, hope you enjoy. I fell in love with the idea.**

**Something from personal experience**

**-5kinnys**


	10. First

You know what a kiss is.

No matter what type of family you come from, if you're parents are the strict religious types they're everywhere. At school, in books, pictures, advertisements, films in public. You can't escape kisses, but for some in one way, they certainly can. Take Pandora for instance, she's never been kissed. _Ever_. She's absolutely terrified, I on one part totally agree with her, the rumours you hear, the expectations, your first is the one time you define every other time on. Apparently.

But for me, it wasn't the- Oh my god, his lips were so soft and he was a perfect kisser, fireworks went off above my head for me. Yet it wasn't the- It was a total disaster, it was like kissing my dog and my elderly aunt both at the same time either. I'll describe the first time I was kissed on the lips, or what I find was my first kiss. I don't think that your absolute first kiss _has_ to be just that, I don't think it's the one with a person you truly love either, because otherwise I haven't had my first kiss yet. There's a whole other lot of first's for kisses, but this is about the legendary one, the mythical-yet-not kiss. The first. Mine was the one that I remember the clearest, the feeling, the thoughts running through my head, unlike most people who say they hit a blank straight away from bliss or whatever, I remember every moment. It's the one that defined ever single kiss after that; by no means was it the perfect heart-stopping kiss from the fairytales but… That was the best kiss I've ever received.

I was 11, madly curled red hair, wonky teeth, bright eyes the whole package. Not quite yet finished with the stage that 'dating' was sharing your mars bar at lunch, but that wasn't it entirely. Well, considering my first kiss was with a boy who was 'going out' with another girl in my year. His name was Brandon, bog-standard brown hair and green eyes. It was at his girlfriend's party I'm ashamed to remember, she had a huge garden and we were all playing hide and seek in this part that seemed almost to feel like a jungle. I had thorns and leaves in my hair which probably made me resemble some mad savage bush child, I swatted annoying flies and dodged weird looking ferns, my palms dirty and my knees grass stained as I crouched between the trees. He'd snuck up behind me.

"Hey", he'd whispered, a nice smile on his face. I spun round and narrowed my eyes at him.

"You scared me half to death!" I'd growled as quietly as I could. He looked about half ready to argue back when I hissed a 'shhhh' at him as someone walked noisily past possibly bulldozing half the bushes somewhere close to our left. I sat down on my butt, turning to face him as I heard squeals from a way away from us. He still had that smile on his face as fly flew into my ear; I flapped my hand around to get it away, then it buzzed off into the canopy. He just grinned at me this time. He wasn't saying _anything_. Then he just leant forward a bit, being the stupid proud creature that I am I just stuck my chin out and held my ground. Obviously he took this as an invitation as he then kissed me. His lips were chapped and so were mine, it wasn't chaste and it wasn't hard. It was just a kiss. But because I wasn't expecting it, I had no reason to be anxious, I looked like crap and he'd never spoken to me before. He never spoke to me again after that. He moved away after that summer. Goddamnit I don't even remember his last name.

But it was the best kiss I ever had.


	11. Damaged Goods

I watched her, breathing raggedly, eyes wide as she came closer toward me, playing with the tips of my long fringe. She looked curious, she looked adorable and I couldn't take it. I squeezed my eyes shut as I felt her thumb touch my chin, I made a short sharp gasp and the thumb was pulled back sharply. I opened my eyes again, heart pounding in my ears as she creased her eyebrows and frowned.

"Did I hurt you?" she whispered, her hand caressing the edge of my neck.

"No", I choked out, transfixed on her touch.

"Oh", she said simply. There was an awkward silence, her hand stopped moving and rested near my heart. She was trying to catch my gaze, to read me through my eyes like she always did, I stared at the intricate feather tattoo below her little finger. She knew me too well, yet she didn't know me at all. She was wondering what was up with me, every time she tried to get near my face and my stupid hair. I let out a long shaky sigh and took hold of her wrists, my calloused thumbs tracing her pale palms slowly. I was stalling.

"_What are you hiding?_" she breathed almost silently, all my neatly packed boxes being kicked to pieces in my mind, the vivid images of the memories I'd taken and placed there and hid away in boxes never to be opened were invading my head, unravelling faster than a wool sweater with a hole in it. How did she do this to me? How did she manage to do what someone trained to do couldn't? I let go of her abruptly, anxious to get rid of the contact. I backed away into the more shadowy part of the loft. She followed me, a determined look on her face yet there was also a hint of tears in her eyes. I cowered, like I always did as she balled her fists at her sides before suddenly shoving me back into one of the plush armchairs. She straddled me, effectively pinning me in all my skinniness, it didn't help she also had her knee pressed against my groin, not enough to do damage but possibly… other things. She had her face mere inches from my own, my eyes were darting all over the place to avoid hers.

"Stop-"

"No", she replied sternly. I started hyperventilating as she started stroking my fringe, she started to pull it back but I grabbed her hand out of reflex, a pleading look was ignored as she snatched her hand back. She pinned my arms, but she pinned me more with her concern. No one had given a shit before. She started back to my fringe again and I knew there was no way I was going to win. I slowly felt slight fingers hesitantly brush the hair away, my eyes closed once again; I heard her gasp and I waited for her to shy away.

"Oh Jay…" she kissed me then, not sweetly, it was raw. I felt my fringe fall back into place as a tear squeezed from the corner of my left eye. Her fingers were on my cheek, I could clearly think of the feel as she broke the kiss, breathing words in my ear that I couldn't make out. She tucked the hair behind my ear as she began to lay fleeting, soft butterfly kisses over the dark, puckered melted skin. I released a breath I hadn't realised I'd been holding as she continued along my jaw, up by my eye. I was damaged goods. I felt like my skin had been scrubbed with a wire brush, from the inside, I shook, the flames licking and stroking my skin in a white hot pain that I couldn't stop.

She helped break me all over again.

"I got burned", I panted out.

"I know Jay… I know"

**This is my favourite chapter.**

**-5kinnys**


	12. Selfish

It was disgusting. I tugged at it, stretched it, looked at it from different angles and pushed it up nothing about it changed. Nothing would get rid of it altogether. They'd said a couple of skin grafts and it would be normal. Normal my fucking ass. After it happened I got angry, I always got angry… but that one time I lost it so bad… I broke my teacher's nose. I read about people who learn to love them, accept them as part of themselves. I hate it, it makes me different, it makes me hide things and it makes me _alien_. And if I could I would wish it have never happened, it doesn't make me a stronger person. It makes me abnormal. Even if it meant me forgetting _her_, I would do it. I guess that's selfish but I don't care.

You don't know _anything_.

**Vent, vent_, vent._  
**


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